"Do you like me?" Evan looked up from his noodles to give me an unamused look.
"I mean, I know you like to have sex with me...but do you like me like me, like, ME?" I put a hand on my chest in case he didn't know who I was talking about. Evan stuck his chopsticks back into this Chinese take out box and then licked his lips quickly.
"Seriously? You're seriously asking me this?" I tried not to pout at his un-seriousness. We were currently sitting Indian style on my kitchen table; we'd ordered take out and dammit, it's not my fault if eating with chopsticks always makes me think.
"Yes seriously."
"Yes. Of course I like you. Even if you are fucking stupid." He seemed to be bothered.
"Please calm down. I didn't ask you to go kill your mom." He went back to eating, ignoring me completely. I twirled some noodles around one of my fingers and helped it on it's journey to my mouth.
"Like, what exactly do you like about me?" I was being obnoxious now but it was funny how much my questions bothered him. I saw his jaw tighten and then he looked up at me with just his eyes.
"Stop fishing."
"I'm not fishing! I really want to know. Want me to go first? I can go first. Okay, so, I like how you smell and how you-"
"How I smell?"
"Yes, but don't interrupt me while I'm swooning over you please." I cleared my throat and started again.
"I like how you pretend to be a lot cooler than you really are. I like when your roots show. I like your hands, especially the poppy out veins in your hands. I like how your shirts always kind of lift up in the back because your shoulders are too wide. I like when you don't always shave. I like your butt in those jeans. I like how you never have tied shoelaces. Um, um, I like when you look like you want to eat me. Okay! Your turn!" He had a small grin on his face and he was looking at me everywhere. He ran a hand through his straight blond hair, making it look a little disheveled, and then scratched his chin.
"Fine. But just so you know, this is fucking gay."
"Yeah yeah yeah, you're so masculine. Don't worry about it, I won't tell anyone that you gave a girl some compliments. Now come on!" I moved my take out box to the side and scooted closer to him, like he was about to tell me something super exciting, which he was. I had to hold in my giggles; didn't have a clue why I was so giddy.
"Fuck, um..." His um dragged on for too long and I glared at him. It shouldn't take him an hour to think up something nice to say about me, fucking asshole. After a few more seconds, when my feelings were seriously damaged, I bit the inside of my bottom lip and jumped off the table.
"Nevermind. I'm going to take a nap so maybe you can go; bye." I practically ran to my bedroom, let Charlie Brown come in with me, and then slammed the door. He couldn't even think of any bullshit to feed me? I would have taken anything! I would have taken 'you're not as ugly as Yoda' for fuck's sake! I pouted into my pillow. I heard the wood floor outside my door creek, need to fix that fucking creek, and a few seconds later I felt a dip in the bed. I could feel the heat from his body hovering over me.
"I like how sensitive you are, and how easy it is to tease you." He whispered hotly into my ear. I kept my face in my pillow though, more to hide my no doubt red face than my anger.
"I like your hair and I like your crooked teeth. I like how soft your skin is and I like this freckle right here." I felt his finger touch the back of my shoulder where my tank top wasn't covering. He kissed the spot where his finger had been.
"What else." I mumbled into my pillow; I heard him laugh a little.
"I like how honest you are, and how you always say what's on your mind." I turned around finally so that I was looking up at him; I tried to hide my huge grin but I might as well have tried to hide China. He placed a hand under my shirt and rubbed at my side.
"I like-"
"Okay, shut up." I said just before I reached up to kiss him. I heard Charlie Brown give a grunt and then heard his little body jump off my bed.
"Have you heard from Tom lately?"
"Who?" I said to Kare as her, me, and Charlie Brown sunbathed in my front yard.
"No you did not just say who. Dude, Tom, the freaking Republican."
"Oh shit! Oh yeah! Fuck I totally forgot about him...hey! He hasn't called me back since that night we made out in front of my lawn! I mean, I only ignored like three of his calls, what a fucking douche bag."
"Are you seriously bitching about this?"
"Well, you have to admit, it IS pretty douchey."
"Yes and you DO have a boyfriend, man toy, bed buddy...thing."
"Evan's NOT my boyfriend." I said feeling shy.
"Oh please, what are you six? You're having sex with each other exclusively; you're pretty much married."
"Well ANYWAYS, what made you think of Tom?"
"Not all of us have a five second memory span." Kare snapped. I pulled my orange glasses down to look over at her; her spark-ly purple bikini was extra glittery in the sun.
"Do you have a thing for Tom?" She sat up immediately and glared at me.
"What? Why would you think that? I mean, I've met the guy like once for a total of fifteen seconds. Are you retarded?"
"Woah, woah, calm down. I just got a feeling." We laid back down in our lawn chairs.
"I mean, he's not bad looking..." I said quietly. Kare didn't say a word.
"And they do say opposites attract..." I added slowly.
"I still have his phone number you know..."
"Olivia, if you say one more thing about Tom I'll shove this lawn chair up your ass." Luckily, for my ass, Oliver came out to join us then; an old school boom box playing some Cyndi Lauper came with him.
I was wiping down the counters before opening up Lovecakes when Farah walked in looking like she had gotten in a fight with a lion.
"Woah, are you alright, Farah?" I asked worriedly as the blond slumped down in one of the booths.
"I'm fine. I think I'm still drunk though, which sucks because that means I'll be hungover by lunchtime."
"Big night last night?"
"I went to another one of Greg's parties. I drank way too much. But it isn't totally my fault; Evan may be an awesome DJ but he SUCKS as a bartender. I kept telling him he was putting in too much fucking Tequila." She rubbed at her forehead. I got a sinking ship feeling in my stomach. Evan hadn't called me at all yesterday, I hadn't actually seen him for three days if I was counting today, which I was.
"Evan was there?" I tried to sound casual but I was always that kid in Theater class with such horrible acting skills that it was physically uncomfortable to watch. Alchol induced Farah didn't seem to notice though. She nodded her head but kept it in her hands.
"Mhm. He's always there. You know, because of Zans." She yawned and stood up to stretch. I could feel that same betrayed feeling I always got when I found out guys I liked were actually just...guys. I had this problem where I always placed men I liked on a very high pedestal...they always disappointed me. I swallowed hard. I mean, technically it's my fault. My standards are too high, I get attached too quickly, I expect too much, I'm clingy and needy, I like assholes. I was hopeless. A hopeless, naive, little idiot who had once again fallen for a guy who knew how to play her, knew exactly what to say to get exactly what he wanted from her. It really was my own fault. The signs were all there, right from the very beginning. Kare was right, I was like a blind person who wanted to stay blind.